Sunday, November 16, 2014

Week 8: The Chill Creeps In

Winter is settling on St. John's. The wind is icy, the leaves are dead, and...I have dug out my impressive scarf collection! This one is a giant double-sided plaid dealy that I am loving right now - it's almost the size of a blanket!

But this post isn't about my scarf love... 

This Week
It went by quickly! With the preparation for the dance recital, the event itself, and the aftermath, I didn't have time to think about being pregnant. As a highly internal person, the idea of being happy about less time to think is strange, but I have learned the value of quality distraction this year. Though us thinkers crave time alone, it is not always beneficial. A task, something that makes me feel worthwhile, is helpful in getting this anxious mind out of the what ifs.

I still haven't fully wrapped my mind around the fact that I am pregnant. I even caught myself running and doing things that I probably shouldn't have been doing during the event. Not from neglect, but because I actually feel pretty normal most days. If it wasn't for my extreme exhaustion and a few other mild symptoms, I wouldn't even believe this was actually happening. It is a mercy, though...if I were constantly reminded of this pregnancy and all that could go wrong, I would be nonfunctional right now.

A part of the calm is, in a way, to do with the fact that I have already done this once and most things are not a surprise. For instance, this time I know that I can sleep however I want until the second trimester, whereas last time I suffered right from 6 to 38 weeks on my side! I also know that most aches and pains are just par for the course, like round ligament pain, etc. It's good to know this stuff because it helps me to not worry every time I have a twinge!

Telling People
We were shown love in so many ways after Haven died, and it really changed my perspective on a lot of the people in our lives. It is not often you are in a situation where all of the masks fall off and the curtains are flung back. I have been feeling a little of that again since we started telling our friends about this pregnancy. The reactions have been so happy and so excited. There have been tears and hugs and is good to be loved.

I don't think we will go the social media route this time with telling people. I have been enjoying just telling people as I feel ready to. Having a not-secret secret is a bit fun too!

The Bean
Baby still has no nickname. I think we'll just do without this time, unless something great comes along.

Anyway, this was not the most focused post, but there it is.


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